My attorney husband says that no matter how thin the pancake, it always has two sides.
This notion guides me in my work with families as I’m forced to admit that each influence on the family system can have both a positive and a negative effect.
Case in point: the use of technological communication in the home.
I often rail against the dangers of overuse of digital devices by both parents and children. I worry that this practice is reducing parent-child interaction and rewiring children's brains at a cost to their social and emotional development.
But here’s the other side of that pancake: the internet connects parents to others who care about them and who can be supportive in ways unimaginable without it.
Social networking, in particular, has made it possible for us to know about others’ needs, including the needs of people whose daily life orbit would not cross ours. This makes it possible for us to reach across the miles to offer love and support.
A friend now living a state away, Laura is married with two children, and her life was going swimmingly until her two-year-old son Everett was diagnosed with leukemia.
Since then, Laura has kept friends apprised of the ups and downs of Everett's treatment in the midst of their busy family life. The good news for Everett is that his prognosis is excellent. The effective treatment to eradicate leukemia has made it one of the great medical research success stories of the last two decades.
But the good news for the rest of us is that the internet has provided a “virtual village” to enable us to stay informed about Everett in an immediate way. Laura can jot a quick post from his hospital room, and we can hold her family in our minds during a scary time. Even if we can’t “stroll” down the hospital corridor with her, we can “scroll” through her words and appreciate a sense of connection with her.
So, while our high-tech tools can come at a cost, if we resist going overboard and instead use them wisely, the benefits can be delightful. Just like a stack of pancakes.
