When we think about “prenatal development,” we mostly refer to the amazing process whereby a fertilized egg becomes a newborn. That journey is nothing short of miraculous when you consider the rapid progression of what resembles a tadpole turning into a fully functional person with a heart that beats, lungs that breathe, arms and legs that move, and a brain that processes an astounding amount of information.
But equally astounding development occurs simultaneously inside the minds of pregnant moms and dads. The nine months of pregnancy see some enormous changes in the perspective of expectant parents.
Just as a baby’s growth is defined by three trimesters of changes, parents’ mental processes also change over these three trimesters. As parents receive the news during the first trimester, they find their worlds turned upside down. Pregnancy reorders priorities like almost nothing else does. Parents have to reconsider things as basic as their homes, vehicles and work schedules as they reckon with the changes. That sharp roadster may be traded in for a sedan, and a third-floor walk-up may lose its appeal when every trip up includes lugging a car seat, a diaper bag, and an infant.
During the less eventful second trimester, mothers feel the first fluttering kicks of their baby’s movement, reminding them that this fetus is a real, separate person.
In the third trimester, parents develop a sense of who their baby really is. They decide he or she is “quiet” or “aggressive,” one who may become a football player or a gymnast. As they look forward to life with this baby, they pay attention when their baby seems more active at night when they want to sleep, and wonder if he’ll be keeping them up in the weeks to come.
While nine months may seem a long time to a woman who is lugging around an abdomen that burdens her every movement, nine months is just barely long enough for parents to be truly ready for their new lives with their child. We interested observers watch with joy as our friend’s expanding waistline signals the growth of her baby over the months of pregnancy. But some of the most astounding growth—the growth in parents themselves—may be harder to see.
