Most of us extend love with the expectation that our kind deeds will come back to us. If we do a friend a favor, we assume that friend will be there in our hour of need. If we offer to cover a duty for a coworker, we know we can count on the same support when we need a back-up.
But this summer, four of my grandchildren are learning a small lesson about giving with no hope for return. They’re fostering a pair of kittens from their local Humane Society.
It seems these kittens must be bottle fed for two weeks to be ready for cat food. A plus for the shelter is that living with children from an early age will socialize the animals for placement with families.
In just a few days, these kittens have learned not to fear the children but to approach them, purring in anticipation of the petting they know will come. Already, the effects of the fostering can be observed in the social skills of these little felines.
I can’t help but draw a parallel with the foster parents I know who lovingly accept children who need a home, prepared to cope with whatever challenges these little ones bring along.
They know their job is to offer a safe environment for children in transition, but foster parents can’t avoid falling a little bit in love with children as they dry their tears and tuck them into bed. They invest themselves, knowing that—at any moment—these children may be whisked away, never to be seen again.
The selflessness of foster parents takes my breath away. I can’t imagine how they invest themselves, becoming vulnerable to losing their hearts to children who they typically won’t raise to adulthood.
They harbor hope that their season together will prepare children to trust their forever families, and to grow up with enhanced social-emotional development, owing partly to good fostering. Foster parents learn to find joy not in the reciprocity of kindness, but in love for love’s sake.
And so I’m grateful for my grandkids’ summer service project. In addition to launching some pretty fine pets, I hope they learn the pleasure of extending love without expectation.
